I read on someone else’s blog (darn it, now I can’t find it!) that the author was challenging readers to create a Summer Mix CD, and that everyone could trade and so forth. I liked the idea. I’ve come up with my own.

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What’s for lunch today? Well, glad you asked. Half a bag of deli-mustard pretzels from yesterday. And a Java Chip Frappuccino (yes, that is the former Chocolate Brownie Frappuccino. I asked. And yes, I’m aware that I can’t actually spell Frappuccino right. But I do it the same way each time. Charming, no?)

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The last few days have been interesting. Talked to on Sunday night and found out he’s been called back to his temporary job, and he had an interview on Monday, a second interview. He’s been out of work long enough - I really think he deserves this.

Talked to on Sunday night too. We hadn’t talked in 3 or 4 weeks (despite the fact that we live less than an hour apart). Amazingly enough, neither of us had much to say.

Tried to talk to . She hasn’t called me back yet. Huh. Did get an email though.

I’ve been broke all week. Actually brought all my change to work on Tuesday - $15 - so I could enjoy coffee until payday (tomorrow). Had minor crisis yesterday while driving to church, realized (remembered?) that my spending habits suck and I’m so crappy at finances and I might not be able to go to Boston for ’s wedding. helped me out, though. We might be driving together. Instead of me flying alone.

Personal life has been… more exciting this week than it has been in a while.

was rough yesterday. Two of my junior high boys (OK, my only two junior high boys) were over-the-top last night, and I had to keep them afterwards to tell them that if their behavior was ever repeated, I would send them home and talk to their parents. That’s always a fun conversation to have.

Small amount of hammock-sitting, too. Such a delight. I know thinks she loves hammocks more than anyone in the world, but I gotta say my appreciation for them is up there.

Co-worker gave me a Krispy Kreme today. It didn’t go so well with the Pop Tarts I was eating for breakfast/lunch. So later I had a Frappuccino and mustard pretzels for lunch/afternoon snack. Guess what I feel like right now?

Finally got rocks for the bottom of Monster’s fish bowl. They’re purple, and coordinate nicely with his red body and blue stripes. He really likes the rocks. Hangs out with them a lot. He’s much happier and more active, too. Plus, it keeps the water cleaner for a longer period of time.

Peace out!

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I have not posted much lately (or at least, it feels that way). It’s not that I haven’t had anything to say - in fact, there have been quite a few things that I’ve thought I should blog about. But I’ve been caught up in (a little bit of) work and, (more involving) reading some really good blogs. I particularly recommend Tequila Mockingbird. It’s hilarious.

And while this may not be what you came here for today, I’ve decided to write down a few of my political/social welfare beliefs. Just to clear things up for my own head.

All life has worth. Hence, I am pro-life. And pro-adoption. And very anti-partial-birth abortion (as well as the other kinds, too).

Things don’t necessarily work they way they are right now, but they’re not TERRIBLE. So I don’t think we need to become communist or socialist or a dictatorship (heaven forbid!). Just a few tweaks.

Homosexuality is wrong. I don’t want it in my church (although I would love homosexuals to be part of my church and faith community, as long as they’re non-practicing… it’s a fine line, I realize). And I don’t want gay marriage to become the norm. However, I think that I’m in favor of civil unions. Just as long as it’s not in my church. Again, a fine line, I realize.

The cycle of poverty needs to be stopped. This means government support for programs that address homelessness, families without food, minimum-wage, joblessness, etc. I would love it if communities did this all on their own, if churches started programs to take care of the “downtrodden, fatherless and the widow.” But in the absence of this, I think the government should step up to the plate.

Let’s face it. We’re a world power. We have a higher standard of living than the rest of the world. So when they ask us for help (or even before they ask for it), we should gladly give it, with as few strings attached as possible. I’m all for international aid. Especially when it comes to AIDS. (If someone runs across a job that involves moving to Africa and hugging and loving on people with AIDS, sign me up. Send it to me. I’m on the next plane. Hasta la vista America.)

The environment is very important to me. Please don’t mess with it. I’m sorry, Bush, but you haven’t done a good job here. Not even a so-so job. I realize that you’ve had this whole war thing to deal with, and I appreciate you taking care of that problem. This is important too. Stop pollution, cutting down forests, work on clean water, stopping global warming, proper land management, etc, they’re all important to me. Not so important that I take time off work to protest at the capitol, but still very important. They do influence the way I vote. And eat (note: cows are bad.)

Freedom is good. I like having the freedom to worship, to work where I want to, to say what I want to, and generally be free. And equal as a woman. I know other countries don’t have this to the same extent we do. I appreciate it. This does mean we have to also protect ourselves from those who don’t want us or others to have freedom. But don’t spend all the money on our armed forces.

So, that’s the basics.

The UN has yet to impress me. In every world situation I’ve studied (Rwanda and this recent Iraq for example), they have yet to do anything. Really. Action is important, people. Otherwise, what good are they? Kofi Annan, I appreciate your commitment to peace and the global perspective you have, and I know that it is much different from my American-media-fed-world-view, but I still think sometimes you’ve got to get off the shore and into the water.

The Republican party stands for several things that I agree with, namely abortion and homosexuality. I like the freedom that the Republicans feel to express their religious views right alongside of their political views. However, they need to stop giving money to the wealthy. They already have it. And they can step it up in a lot of other areas.

The Democrats spend money the way I like, on social welfare programs and not the military. I wish they would spend more time speaking about their faith, because their lack of this makes me think they don’t have any. And I wish they would spend less time criticizing GWBush.

John Kerry - I think I may end up voting for you. However, your current ad where you talk about the war in Iraq makes you sound stupid. We should involve the international community? Don’t you think we’ve tried? They really don’t want to be involved. It’s just a naive thing to say.

GWBush - if you could change your environmental policies, you’d have me sold.

To all interested parties - I am of legal age to vote, and when I am properly informed, choose to vote. Any information you’d like to send me that is not political doublespeak or insults to the other party, I will gladly accept.

Listening to: Josh Groban (pitter-patter)

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rarely are lyrics better than I think they are, but here are some

“i’m not a perfect person. there are many things i wish i didn’t do
but i continue learning. i never meant to do those things to you.
and so i have to say before i go, that i just want you to know

i’ve found a reason for me to change who i used to be
a reason to start over new, and the reason is you

i’m sorry that i hurt, it’s something i must live with everyday
and all the pain i put you through, i wish that i could take it all away
and be the one who catches all your tears, that’s why i need you to hear

i’m not a perfect person. i never meant to do those things to you
and so i have to say before i go that i just want you to know

i’ve found a reason for me, to change who i used to be
a reason to start over new, and the reason is you
i’ve found a reason to show a side of me you dind’t know
a reason for all that id o, and the reason is you”

I can think of quite a few people I could say this to. Mostly guys that I’ve dated or… been friends with. And not in a “I’m going to change to get you back” or a “I want you back” sort of a way. Just… I’ve learned a lot about myself from others, from the ways that I’ve treated, from how I’ve hurt because I hurt them. It changes the way I go into things now, and sometimes the way I leave things.

For instance, I dated a guy in the beginning of college, , who was a really great guy. As a person, as a friend, he was wonderful. And terribly romantic, and patient. He was my second real boyfriend, and it took two weeks of dating (and college dating meant that we got together at least once a day) before he kissed me, and then he was super-cool when I said I didn’t want to. He was so much more into me than I was into him. And I knew it. But I liked… being adored, being treated that way. He’d hold my hand and he’d say nice things and every moment I was with him I felt beautiful and loved. I didn’t love him, though. I knew it would never work out. I stayed in the relationship too long, though. He got hurt, eventually, when I broke it off. He wasn’t in the same relationship I was. It hurt so much to know that I had put him through all that, needlessly. So I made myself a promise that from then on, I would only date guys to whom I was attracted. It sounds like a silly promise, but one that hasn’t always been easy. I had a history of dating guys I wasn’t terribly physically attracted to, but they were wonderful people. This resolve has been tested a few times, too. There was a time when another friend of mine, (also, I know, it makes it confusing), who wanted to date me, and I thought long and hard about it because we were best friends and it would have been perfect. I talked to a friend of mine who was engaged to a guy she was friends with at first, and then they fell in love, and I asked her how that happened. And she explained it in a way that I don’t remember, but I do know that I interpreted it to mean things weren’t going to change with the way I felt about .

On the flip-side, I have been attracted to a lot of guys who haven’t wanted to date me. I haven’t asked why (who would?). This leads me to believe that either 1) those attractions, when they finally happen at the same time, are amazing and those people are so special to have found that, or 2) there’s something wrong with me. I’m choosing to believe 1. We’ll see how I feel about that at 35.

Speaking of flips and flops. I’m wearing sandals today (OK, they’re not technically flip-flops), and they make a lot of noise when I walk, especially stairs. Does anyone (ladies, I mean) know how to get them to stop flipping (or flopping, if that’s the noisy part)?

Listening to: Hoobastank, “The Reason”… Coming up next: Josh Groban

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Here’s an article [link removed] from World Vision on the 10-year anniversary of the Rwandan genocide.

And here’s how you can learn more about World Vision’s current action in Rwanda.

I’m considering adopting a second child through World Vision. No, wait. A first child through World Vision. Iriseth is through Compassion International. But I need to get my finances a little more in order (or any order at all) before doing so. I would really like a child from Rwanda. Or Malawi, where is. Or both. Hmm. I wish I made more money so I could give more of it away.

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I somehow didn’t remember that fish ownership was so demanding. Monster needs to have his water changed like once a week! But he’s feeling much better now that he’s got clean water with oxygen in it. He may have just looked at me and smiled.

Last night in youth group the junior highers thoroughly impressed me - I didn’t bring the paper to work that I wrote down what they said, so I’ll have to share it later. Stay tuned.

Volunteering for ’s employer’s charity event tonight. Hopefully this means I’ll be serving chocolate (I expressed my desire not to serve alcohol, which seems to perhaps have complicated things, but we’ll see…).

Apparently the 8:41 is not running. I know that Metro Transit said when the buses came back (Monday) that no routes had been cut, but seriously, I haven’t seen it all week. I was there today long before 8:41, and yet I got on the 8:54. Yeah.

Benefits of it being Administrative Professional’s Day: free pizza today for lunch, courtesy of the Management Team.

Note to self: when out getting coffee, DO stop by the vendor in Norwest, who is cute and has a nice slavic accent.

I just got a white rose from a co-worker for being an “Administrative Professional” - also known as Support Staff. At least there’s one week a year when I feel appreciated for this mindless peon job.

Must finish breakfast before consuming lunch.

Played this exercise with an email friend, and thought I’d share. Comment back with your answers if you wish. I’d love to hear your answers too (and know who’s reading)…

4 positive words to describe your character

–>loyal, gracious, puerile, and priggish (word & I learned last week)

3 most tragic flaws

–>pride/self-esteem, contrariness, fear of people (or just social interaction with strangers)

2 most annoying habits

–>sleeping through my alarm clock, being perfectionistic

1 pet peeve.

–>I have this neighbor who perpetually parks his truck in a terrible spot in the alley and makes it impossible for anyone else to pass.

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No, I didn’t get Leeann Chin twice for lunch. Just clearing off my desk and found this one I’d been saving.

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I started a new book last night (after having finished book 2 of Lord of the Rings and being too broke to purchase book 3 right now) by Calvin Miller (see the link for biography information). The book I’m reading is “A Requiem For Love,” which is basically a dramatic, poetic retelling of the creation story. Here’s the part that caught me last night:

[God speaking to man] “… There is no such thing as ‘giftless’ love.
The very words accuse each other.
My gift to you is love, but
Worship is your gift to Me.
And Oh, most glorious it is!
Worship always calls Me ‘Father’ and
Makes us both rich with a common joy.
Worship Me, for only this great gift
Can set you free from the killing love of self,
And prick your fear with valiant courage
To fly in hope through moments of despair.
Worship will remind you
That no man knows completeness in himself.
Worship will teach you to speak your name,
When you’ve forgotten who you are.
Worship is duty and privilege,
Debt and grand inheritance at once.
Worship, therefore, at those midnights
When the stars hide.
Worship in the storms till love
Makes thunder whimper and grow quiet
And listen to your whispered hymns.
Worship and be free.”

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Here it is…

OK, so it’s not actually today’s - it’s one from a while ago. But today’s sucked.

Listening to: Jessica Andrews, “Now”

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We saw Rent this weekend? Here’s proof!

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Monster (my work fish, a male beta) is the only fish left. Bandit passed away on Friday night. I’m going to let the tank sit empty for a while to hopefully get rid of some toxins or just… let it be.

Had a pretty good weekend, even though I spent way more money than I should have. Rent was awesome, as was Tanpopo. On the way to Rent (we parked in the Fields’ lot) we stopped in so I could show the ballerina prom dress. A coworker of mine doesn’t like it, but he’s 50, so I don’t think he counts. We had a good time at Rent, despite having to sit through the first half next to these annoying middle-aged ladies, and then just being in general freezing cold the whole time.

Saturday morning I went to a meeting and secured a community garden plot for & myself. Then I did some cleaning (not much though) and took a trip to buy groceries and some stuff for gardening. Spent much of the afternoon on the balcony planting, with the cats wandering around the roof. It was gorgeous out. I think I could have gotten a nice tan if so inclined. Then I got my hair cut and stopped by the fabric store since I was out that way. Got some nice “scrim” to change the draping over my bed - white now instead of blue. Much better. My room is still a mess, though, so I don’t think you can really tell. I need to do laundry. And take a bunch of stuff to Goodwill. And vacuum. Kitties shed a lot.

Watched “Miss Congeniality” and ate pizza for dinner. No, wait, pizza was Sunday lunch. Saturday night I made potatoes and chicken with mushrooms and garlic. And coleslaw. Eh, not too great, but not horrible. Next time, I’ll use the right kind of vinegar.

Sunday was spent waking up late (skipping first service and most of Sunday School) and then after going over to a church lady’s house to rake her yard with the youth group. We had a good time and were done by 1:15. Stopped by Target, indulged myself with Krispy Kremes which I’d been craving for weeks, and bought light bulbs. I know, terribly exciting. Youth group last night went OK, much better than the junior high lesson on the same. Only six kids though, and all from the same vehicle (most from the same family, plus 2 friends). It’s been a disappointing way to end the year, with declining attendance, especially since at the beginning of the year we were prepared for low attendance with the schedule change.

I did get to watch Crossing Jordan when I got home, despite the storm that blew through here. Drove very slow on the way home. But I kept myself company with thoughts of a charming guy and things he said. [remaining calm]

Work today sucks. Boring. Not too much to do. Just enough that I should be occupied, but they’re all crappy projects. Nothing even remotely fun. Blah.

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 Here are some adorable pictures of the felines, taken awhile back. They’re laying on my sleeping bag on the floor, which they love. Hence it needs to be washed.

Aren’t we cute?

chewing on . A favorite pasttime.

Close-up of the lovebirds.

This is my favorite game to play with . Put her in my shirt. She hates it. Mostly because she doesn’t like being close to anyone’s face, and because she doesn’t really like me. Unless I’m the only one around, in which case she loves me.

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I said it yesterday and I’ll say it again. I go a little crazy on crushes. Really. Trying to control myself at the moment. If he could be, perhaps, a little less perfect and charming, that would help a lot. Thanks.

Have I mentioned lately (of course not, because I’m not so good at giving praises) that I have THE COOLEST ROOMMATE EVER. Not only did she buy me a beer last night to celebrate her bonus at work, but she is taking me to Rent tonight! Amazing! Today is the most perfect day ever. Tanpopo for dinner, then Rent, plus a very nice email from a perfectly charming gentleman. Really. I can’t stop smiling. One of my coworkers left early so he didn’t have to deal with my unusually-happy self.

Listening to: my heart beating. tha-thump. tha-thump

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I mean, I’ve been here all day, but have yet to do anything that really relates to, well, work. Probably because the next task I have to do I abhor. It’s awful. But at least while I spend the next 2 hours doing it, I can intermittently blog. Yay for you.

So I went and took this quiz yesterday linked from somebody else’s blog. And then it turned out to be an online dating thing. But it was free, and I was stressed at work, and it was a fairly decent way to de-stress.

And then I found someone who was fairly compatible. The key definition of “fairly compatible” being “he loves Jesus alot.”

So most of you haven’t known me when I’ve had a real-life crush (not these silly celebrity ones I’ve made up recently), but, well, I tend to get a little crazy. Go overboard. And I fall really hard and really fast into “love.” So please feel free to point out, at any time, that I am being IRRATIONAL or STUPID. I thank you in advance.

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