I have all these emotions that I can talk about rationally, but I don’t feel them anymore. I want to feel them, but something is in the way. I don’t know if its my unwillingness to be vulnerable, or a defense system protecting me because of the past, or the depression. The strongest emotion I have is the overwhelming… fear, concern, worry, whatever… about my finances. The last time I felt anything was last weekend at Homecoming. I feel nothing at church. I feel nothing at home. On the phone. Even while visiting , although I was in interviewing mode, and I was noticeably relieved and relaxed. I did enjoy the fall colors on the dirt roads yesterday and today. And I smiled a couple of times tonight while working on my scrapbook. Actually got teary-eyed when reading old love letters from . But on a consistent basis, I’d like to … feel again.

popularity: 11%

Some moments you just feel… right with the world. I know there are impending decisions, complications, imperfect relationships, flaws in myself, and just plain difficult stuff. But for right now, they’ve gone. Just five minutes.

popularity: 9%